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Flatline

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Feb. 6th, 2006 | 12:11 am
mood: Grrrr
music: Buffy
posted by: piratefanatic in mykeysandquills

Flatline

Dripdripdripdrip
flourescence against emptyness
emptyness for eyes
open closed
cold skin
not real

a drip
not orange
not red
not purple
whites and pinks and blues
peeling back
smiling at me

she’s screaming
I think
or maybe just mouthing
I can’t hear
and shaking-
she’s shaking
or I’m shaking
or screaming

it drops
falls from my hands
a blue rag
a blue smear on that ridiculously pristine tile
a red smear
my hands
my fingertips
stuck between the crevases in my fingerprint

I’m struck
beaten nerely senselss by the urge to
scrub
rip
tear
bleach
get it off
get it out
get me out
I realize I’ve wiped my face
smeared my tears
smeared across my face
her blood

I should scream
I have, I do
my throat burns silence

I shouldn’t scream
too many people
white coats
green scrubs
blue gloves

I want to watch
I don’t want to watch
eyes burn
blink. blink. blink.
I’m afraid if I close my eyes
she will too
only, I’ll open mine
and she won’t.

I should be heaving
emptying my gut of crackers and water
that’s all I’ve eaten for a week
all that sits in a leaden lump
weighing against my pelvis

the needle dips
darts
stabs
spears
slashes

I can’t look, can’t see
the new spills of that color
I’d close my eyes
only then I see red
my blood, somehow still contained

and him
tongue licking teeth
tasting her,
tasting my sister
and grinning

the fucking cur was grinning

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Comments {1}

Alina

NOTES

from: piratefanatic
date: Feb. 6th, 2006 02:20 pm (UTC)
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Change title! Somehting relating to dogs, perhaps? Also, the last line: "was grinning" is not good. Not good at all. No idea how to fix it, though. The first stanza doesn't really fit with the rest. More abstract, and almost not related to the rest. Just a little tweaking there should do it. Or maybe use all that, but begin with something new?

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